Petals on the Ground
by ProfessionallyCrazedNarutoFan
Summary: Drabble collection. Snippets of the lives of Sasuke and Sakura, and sometimes Sarada. Tears & laughter, love & heartache, friends & family, always Sasuke & Sakura.
1. busy

**So, this is basically my drabble dump and where I'll post prompts given to me on tumblr. All SasuSaku, all the time, with a healthy serving of Sarada. Some might be connected, most won't. Enjoy!**

**prompt:** Sakura isn't answering her phone.  
**disclaimer:** naruto, not mine since 1999.

* * *

The persistant ringing of a telephone shrills throughout the dark apartment. The phone has been ringing off the hook for the better part of a week, but the thin layer of dust collecting on top of the device suggests that its owner hasn't seen this room in some days.

Despite the lack of response, the phone continues to ring even as the voicemail inbox reaches its maximum capaxity, dutifully issuing its lonely cry into the empty silence.

That is, until down the hallway a door slams open and rocks on its hinges and angry footsteps emerge.

* * *

In her office, Shizune slams the phone down onto the receiver. Immediately, she picks it back up and redials the same number again.

Haruno Sakura has been AWOL for her last six and a half shifts, and Shizune doesn't know whether to be worried or angry. After consulting with the Rokudaime, she has confirmed that Sakura has not been assigned to any missions, nor has she fallen ill to his knowledge.

So where the hell is she?

It's not like Sakura to not pick up the phone or respond as soon as possible to voicemails (of which Shizune and several other nurses have left 329). By her count, Sakura's number has been dialed close to 950 times in the last week, with not one pick-up.

But the older woman is not about to let her off the hook, so she furiously redials the number again.

Miraculously, this time someone picks up.

"Hn. What do you want?"

That deep, gruff voice most definitely does not belong to Sakura. It does, however, sound very similar to that of Uchiha Sasuke. Shizune is not intimidated by his attitude, and demands to know where the medic nin is.

"This is Shizune, from the hospital. We've been trying to reach Sakura rather urgently for the last week. Is she there?"

"She's busy."

Shizune splutters, "Excuse me?"

The Uchiha sighs impatiently. "She's occupied, and will be for the foreseeable future. Don't call again."

"Occupied with WHAT?!" She practically hollers into the phone, her temple rising in a similar fashion to that of her former shishou.

Sasuke's eyeroll is nearly audible through the phone. "She's engaging in more _fruitful_ pursuits and will return when the terms of her _engagement_ have been _satisfied_. Is that clear?"

"What?! Not at all! What does that even-"

The line goes dead and the sound of a phone hitting the wall at high speed can be heard down the hall.

* * *

"Sasuke-kun, who was that?"

Sakura emerges from the bedroom in one of Sasuke's over-large white shirts, her hair tousled and small, delicate purple bruises dusting her neck. Standing seems to be difficult for her as she leans against the doorframe.

"No one. Just a telemarketer." Sasuke shrugs and tugs on her elbow, leading her back to the bedroom.

Sakura frowns. "I'm surprised the hospital hasn't called, its been quiet all week."

But as Sasuke tugs her back into bed, nibbling on her neck, work is the furthest thing from her mind.


	2. Misadventures in Mouth-to-Mouth

**Title: **Misadventures of Mouth-to-Mouth (or: Why Sakura Had to Resuscitate Naruto a Second Time)  
**Prompt: **Sasuke finds out about the "CPR."  
**Disclaimer:** Naruto, not mine since 1999.

* * *

The sun sets on the end of a particularly rousing mission, and Team Seven is resting at the mouth of a lazy river. Naruto leans over the clear water with a look of intense concentration in his face as he tries to catch a fish bare-handed. Several feet away, Sakura is tending to the cuts and bruises that Sasuke has managed to accumulate during the last ambush.

Naruto glances slyly in the direction of his two teammates, plotting. When Sasuke returned to Konoha with them after the war, he'd all but admitted that he had feelings for the petite pinkette. He'd put off acting on it, however, and now, two years later with Team Seven reformed, their tentative steps toward something resembling a relationship are moving far too slow for Naruto's liking.

So he'll just give them a gentle nudge.

"Ne, teme, you're lucky those rogue nin didn't knock you into the river. Sakura-chan might have had to give you CPR."

Sasuke gives him a blank look. "And? She's a medic, it's part of her job."

Naruto waves off that comment dismissively. "True, but Sakura-chan's the best. She had to do it to me once, right Sakura-chan? I almost died, and the first thing I remember when I woke up is the taste of her cherry chapstick-"

Sakura flushes and Sasuke's eyes narrow dangerously. "That seems like an awfully minor detail for you to remember."

Naruto laughs. "Minor? Yeah, I guess. Sakura-chan has really nice, soft lips, I definitely remember that, and the way-"

Whatever else Naruto remembers is lost to the wind as Sasuke barrels into him and knocks him into the river, holding his head under the water.

"Sasuke-kun, stop it! He'll drown!" Sakura shrieks as she uses her chakra-enhanced strength to haul Sasuke away from the blonde.

Sasuke scowls and walks away as Sakura pulls an unconscious Naruto from the river. "Idiot!" She hurls at his retreating back.

She leans down so that her ear is next to Naruto's nose. Hearing no breathing, she immediately begins the process of CPR. Thirty chest compressions, followed by twelve seconds of holding his nose and breathing into his mouth.

Leaning against a tree, Sasuke looks on in agitation. After a couple minutes of Sakura's ministrations, Naruto opens one eye and winks at the Uchiha.

Sasuke lunges for him again.

But Sakura beats him to it as she realizes the prank that Naruto pulled. He goes flying clear across the river after she punches him.

Sakura looks up after thoroughly wiping her mouth to find Sasuke standing directly in front of her expectantly.

"You will teach me CPR," he informs her, "You will demonstrate on me, and then I will practice on you. I will require a lot of practice, so we should start now."

Sakura smirks at him wryly before pushing him to the ground.


	3. the fall

**prompt: **sasuke sees sakura falling.  
**disclaimer:** naruto, not mine since 1999.

* * *

Sasuke has always watched time blur by in slow motion. It is the gift of his clan to scale down the passage of time with their eyes so that they might out-maneuver their enemies.

Today, he isn't fast enough.

He sees with perfect clarity the blow that sends his petite teammate reeling, watches as time nearly freezes as she teeters off the edge of a sharp drop-off. She seems to hang there in the air for a moment, her body twisted gracefully like that of a ballerina.

Then the drop.

Her name rips from his throat in a raw scream and he pumps massive amounts of chakra to his feet as he races to the cliff's edge. Ignoring his other teammates calling after him, ignoring the remaining enemy nin, he steps horizontally down, clinging to the sheer vertical wall by the soles of his feet as he runs downward.

She's falling far too fast for someone so small, and Sasuke strains to catch up. He runs with everything he has, fueled by fear and pure adrenaline.

He can't allow himself to think. If he does, he'll think about what will happen when—_if_—her body hits the ground. He can't think about that, won't think about that, so he orders his feet to move faster.

As he finally reaches her falling speed and reaches out to grab her wrist, Sasuke looks down and realizes how dangerously close to the bottom of the ravine they are. Frantically, he reaches for her, only to have her just out of reach of his fingertips.

There's only one way to catch her, and he doesn't regret it as he launches himself off the wall.

_SakuraSakuraSakura._

His only thought is her name through the haze of pain.

He'd caught her in time to use his body to take the brunt of the force of impact with the ground from her. She's wrapped in his arms, still unconscious and slightly bruised, but _alive_.

Sasuke would break his body over and over again to keep her that way.


	4. jealousy and company

**prompt:** jealous sasuke  
**disclaimer:** naruto, not mine since 1999.

* * *

"Sakura."

"Mmm. What is it, Sasuke-kun?"

"I want him out of our house. He's been living here uninvited for _two months_."

"Don't be ridiculous, Sasuke-kun. He wasn't uninvited. He offered to help out, and I accepted."

"And how did that end up turning into an invitation to move in?"

"Ugh, Sasuke-kun, it's just easier this way. I'm pregnant and you're busy. It's nice to have an extra pair of hands helping around the house "

"Sakura, he's the _Hokage_, he's busier than I could ever be."

"He's also the godfather of this baby and he wants to help. Really, I don't know what your problem is."

"We don't need him here."

"Well, _I_ do."

"…"

* * *

"Mmm. Ahhh. Wow, that feels amazing. You're really good at this."

Sasuke glares over the top of the scroll he's failing at reading as another man puts his hands on _his_ wife.

Sakura is eight months pregnant and Hatake Kakashi is sitting next to her on the couch with her feet in his lap, giving her the most erotic foot massage Sasuke has ever heard.

His sharingan activates as Sakura lets out another low moan of pleasure, stretching her arms over her head as Kakashi works the arches of her swollen feet.

Sakura has taken to wearing Sasuke's shirts around the house along with a pair of white leggings. The high-collared, navy shirt is so large on her that it could pass for a dress, and it rides up on her thighs as she stretches.

Sasuke watches Kakashi's gaze like a hawk, prepared to defend his wife's honor should he catch the old pervert even try to sneak a peek where he shouldn't.

But their old sensei is all innocence as he finishes the massage, patting Sakura's pregnant belly affectionately. Sasuke rolls his eyes. You would think it was Kakashi's own kid in there rather than the first Uchiha conceived since the massacre.

Obsidian eyes narrow to slits. But what if it isn't…

"Sasuke-kun, you're making that face again."

His expression contorts into indignation. "I do _not_ make a _face_."

Sakura gives him a look as she rises to her feet, hand supporting her aching back. "Yes, you do. It's your 'I'm overthinking things and wondering about something completely irrational that has no basis in fact' face."

She frowns suddenly. "Sasuke-kun, we don't have any ramen in the house, do we?"

Sighing because he knows what's coming, Sasuke resigns himself to making another grocery run for Sakura's cravings. "No, why?"

She looks at him hopefully. "Well, I just really have this craving for Ichiraku's pineapple ramen." Before Sasuke can wrinkle his nose in disgust, she continues. "Oh, and can you stop and pick up some whipped cream too? Thanks!"

Sasuke tries not to grumble, because he figures that as the not-pregnant one he doesn't have it that bad. But still. Ick.

On his way down the hall, he hears Kakashi giggle and his muffled voice.

"Let's french-braid your hair!"

Sasuke growls as he slams the front door behind him.

* * *

Two months later, Sasuke drops the dish he is washing in alarm as he hears Sakura yell from the living room. He rushes into the room to find her clutching her belly over a wet puddle on the floor.

"The baby's coming!" she wails.

Before Sasuke can take more than two steps toward her, Kakashi flash-steps beside Sakura, half folded laundry flying everywhere around him. He picks Sakura up bridal style, cradling her carefully in his arms.

He flash-steps again, leaving Sasuke alone to wonder what in the hell just happened.

* * *

Trudging into the hospital in a foul mood, Sasuke glowers and silently threatens every nurse in sight until they take him to the delivery room.

Inside, his wife is already lying on the bed with her ankles in holsters, her face contorting in pain. Kakashi is by her side, squeezing her hand and encouraging her to push.

Sasuke snaps. "Get out," he snarls.

Kakashi glances at him in disapproval. "Now is not the time to be selfish, Sasuke. Today is about Sakura."

The Uchiha grips his hair in frustration and lets out a bark of laughter. "You mean my wife that I haven't had a single minute alone with in four months? My wife whose company you've hogged nonstop? My wife who's having MY baby and I can't even be there for her because there's no room in here for me?"

To his eternal disgruntlement, nobody in the room has heard a thing he just said, as Sakura has begun to push the baby out.

A nurse tugs him by the arm out of the room, telling him he'll have to wait outside so as to give Sakura room to breathe.

Stranded in the waiting room, Sasuke stares at the closed door of the delivery room incredulously.

He's just been kicked out of his own child's birth.

* * *

An hour later, Sasuke is slumped angrily in an uncomfortable metal chair next to Naruto, who is chattering excitedly non-stop.

He glares at the closed doors, hoping to melt them with his sharingan.

Ten minutes later, Kakashi emerges from the room in scrubs, wiping tears of joy from his eye. He pulls Sasuke into an ecstatic hug, slapping him on the back in congratulations.

"Oh, Sasuke, you should see her. She's beautiful."

He has a daughter? He jerks out of Kakashi's embrace and storms the delivery room.

Inside, a tired-looking Sakura is cooing at the small bundle in her arms. Sasuke approaches them slowly, staring.

The baby has a tuft of shiny black hair on her head, and when she looks up at him, he sees eyes the color of the void.

Definitely his.

Sakura beams at him, and her brilliant smile eases some of the tension inside him. "Isn't she beautiful?" she asks, turning her attention to their daughter again.

Sasuke nods, throat constricted.

Sakura carefully lifts the baby, offering her for Sasuke to hold. He accepts her with awe and reverence, feeling the raw wound of his parents' death closing as this baby girl completes his new family.

So enraptured is he that he only catches the tail end of what Sakura is saying

"…by the way, Kakashi's going to be our live-in nanny. Hes already sold his apartment and called the movers. Isn't that great!"

Sasuke freezes. Oh hell no.

"KAKASHIIIIIIIIIIIIII."


	5. the first

**prompt: **Sasuke and Sakura witness one of Sarada's "firsts."  
**disclaimer:** naruto, not mine since 1999.

* * *

It's been a long month away from home, and Sasuke is silently relieved to be home with his tiny family. It's late in the evening, about the time for two year-old Sarada to be put to bed.

As he removes his shoes and heads down the hall toward his daughter's room, he spots Sakura coming from the other end of the hallway, carrying Sarada's favorite stuffed green dinosaur.

The stuffed toy was a gift from Kakashi, and Sarada carries it around like it's her own child. She refuses to sleep without it, and it's a nightly ritual for it to be tucked into bed beside her.

Sasuke beckons Sakura over, reaching for the toy, but Sakura hesitates. He glares at her. She glares right back at him.

"Sakura, let me do it. It's been a month since I've seen her." He tugs on the dinosaur's head.

Sakura tugs back on the tail. "Exactly, Sasuke-kun. She's used to me doing it, and she needs consistency and stability."

They're speaking in hushed tones so as not to disturb Sarada, but their tug-o-war over the stuffed toy becomes more intense as neither one refuses to give ground.

Finally fed up, Sasuke yanks hard and pulls the toy into the bedroom. But as he does, Sakura firmly stands her ground with chakra-enchanced limbs, and as he moves forward there is a terrible ripping sound.

There is an awful silence ad both of them freeze in horror and Sarada peeks her head out from the crib.

"Pap-" she starts to call, but the word bubbles and dies on her lips as she sees the two rent halves of her beloved Dino.

Then Sakura is moving, trying to head off the incoming disaster by cooing reassurances, but it's too late. Nothing Sakura or Sasuke can offer can stem the tide of screams that start issuing from their daughter.

Sharp wails of grief fill the entire house as big crocodile tears slide Sarada's cheeks from eyes shut tightly. Totally lost, they put Dino's remains in the crib with her, and Sarada clutches at them like the lifeless body of a loved one.

She is completely inconsolable, immune to promises of a new toy that's the exact same, or bribes of her favorite treat. She shakes her head hard every time they try to touch her, and her wails of grief become screams of rage.

Sasuke turns away to go call Kakashi out of desperation, when Sakura shrieks his name is pulls him back by his sleeve.

Turning back to his daughter, Sasuke sees what he would have never thought possible from a two year-old, even an Uchiha.

Sarada's angry infant eyes are a deep blood red, with a single tomoe spinning in each of them.

Sasuke stares, dumbfounded. Her sharingan awakened at the loss of a stuffed animal? And so young? He's never heard of such a thing.

Sakura is staring open-mouthed at him, looking for answers, but he has none, so he shrugs.

After a while, her screams die down to sobs, and she allows Sasuke to hold her as she cries herself to sleep. He rocks her gently in his arm, placing a gentle kiss in her hair.

Sakura tiptoes from the room, carrying the torn Dino.

She will stay up all night sewing it back together.


	6. present for papa

**title: **present for papa  
**disclaimer:** naruto, not mine since 1999.

* * *

Sakura fastens the last of the buttons on Sasuke's cloak and stands up on her tiptoes, planting a sweet goodbye kiss on his lips. Sasuke returns it warmly, his hand resting on the small of her back.

As they pull apart, he looks around, frowning. "Where is Sarada?"

He will be gone for a few days on a mission, and the thought of leaving without saying goodbye to his daughter does not sit right with him. She has been quiet and reclusive since he told her a few days ago that he'd be leaving again. Her distance distresses him.

But Sakura smiles knowingly and shakes her head as she ushers him toward the door, her movements strangely and deliberately loud.

As they slide the front door open, the rapid pitter-patter of small feet can be heard racing down the hallway.

"Papa papa papa! Wait!"

Sarada skids to a halt in front of them, clutching something tightly to her chest. Panting, she holds it out to Sasuke. "Please take this with you, Papa!"

As he takes it from her, Sasuke's breath catches in his throat. The object is a small, handmade doll with black yarn hair, a navy dress with the Uchiha crest sewn on (obviously Sakura's handywork), and a tiny pair of glasses glued to her face.

With her heart in her throat, Sarada explains. "This is Sara-chan. She'll go with you wherever you travel, so you won't get lonely. And whenever you miss us, you can hug her and I'll know that you're thinking of us."

She blushes nervously, but Sasuke is touched. He kneels down and pulls her into a tight hug. "Thank you," he tells her gravely, "I'll take good care of Sara-chan."

He places the doll into a pocket sewn on the inside of his cloak, next to his heart. Sarada beams and kisses her papa on the cheek.

"Come home soon."


	7. under the same sky

**prompt: **the first time mama leaves instead of papa.  
**disclaimer:** naruto, not mine since 1999.

* * *

"Do you have to go, mama?"

Sarada's bottom lip quivers, but she refuses to cry. She will be strong like her mama, and mama never cries when papa leaves. She only smiles because she knows he'll come back.

Sakura kneels down beside her daughter, kissing her identical forehead gently. "Do you want to know a secret?" She asks as she rubs their noses in an eskimo kiss.

Sarada nods, expression still downcast.

Sakura pulls back a little and tilts her head back. "Do you see how big the sky is?"

Today it's a perfect blue and painted with fluffy cumulus clouds.

The young girl nods again. Sakura takes her face in her hands, her eyes shining with love and certainty.

"As long as we are both under the same sky, you will never be alone."

* * *

Sarada stands next to papa on the front step as they wave goodbye to mama. His arm around her gives her a slight squeeze of reassurance, and Sarada sighs.

Mama will be in Suna for the next three weeks while she trains their medics in a new technique that she's developed with Shizune-nee-san.

So she and papa are alone together until mama comes back, and Sarada doesn't remember a time when she was ever alone with papa for so long. She looks up to find him smiling gently at her.

"What do you want to do?"

Sarada thinks for a moment. Then she has an idea.

* * *

It's late at night when Sakura returns home, close to one in the morning. After quietly placing her boots by the door, she tiptoes through the house.

She frowns as she passes by the bedroom, not sensing Sasuke's chakra inside. Casting her awareness out further, she picks up the flicker of his dormant, sleeping chakra down the hall in Sarada's room.

Puzzled, she travels the ten feet down the hall and slides the door open. What she finds inside takes all the breath from her lungs and fills her heart so full of love and pride that she thinks it might burst.

Sasuke is sleeping reclined against a pile of pillows, his long legs hanging off the end of their daughter's single bed. Sarada is curled up asleep against his chest, wrapped in the comforter from her and Sasuke's bed.

Sakura's face aches from smiling so hard. She makes to move toward them, but her foot clangs against a large metal object laying in the floor. Bending down to inspect it, Sakura discovers that it's a can of paint. Looking around the room, she sees several more empty cans of paint littering the floor. Surprised that she didn't notice it before, she finally detects the odor of fresh paint.

Looking around, the walls and the furniture look untouched. Sakura frowns and wonders what they could have possibly-

And then she looks up.

Sarada's ceiling has been painted a pastel blue the color of a warm spring sky, dotted with large swatches of cloud-shaped white.

"Mama?"

Sakura turns to find her two precious people blinking sleepily at her. Kneeling beside the bed, she pulls them both into a tight hug. "What's all this?" she asks warmly.

Sarada smiles faintly, falling back into sleep.

"This way we can always be under the same sky."


	8. that's my girl

**title:** that's my girl  
**disclaimer:** naruto, not mine since 1999.

* * *

Playdates are not uncommon for the Uchiha and Uzumaki families. They are, in fact, a regular occurance, given the closeness of the parents and the similar age of the children.

It's a nearly perfect spring day as they gather behind the old Uchiha estate, by the pond where Sasuke used to practice katon as a child. Their picnic has been consumed, and now they are each relaxing in the warm sun.

Himawari giggles as Hinata braids her short hair, while next to them Sakura weaves a flower crown for the young girl. Meanwhile, Naruto is sprawled out across the picnic blanket, snoring loudly.

Sasuke watches with mild interest as their oldest progeny spar by the water. At eleven, Sarada is not far from graduating from the Academy. She is at the top of her class, which is no less than Sasuke expected (and he gives every credit to Sakura for passing along her formidable intellect). Boruto, like his father, is the class clown, but his fledgling skills are nothing to sneeze at either.

Sarada is pressing the attack, forcing Boruto closer and closer to the lake's edge. He glances back at the water before frantically forming hand signs that Sasuke easily recognizes. A shadow clone of the young Uzumaki appears, circling around behind Sarada. She goes to make her own hand signs, but as she does the clone flips the back of her skirt up while Boruto grabs her glasses.

"Hey, Uchiha, nice panties you've got there. Are those cherries?" Boruto snickers at his own taunt.

Sasuke growls deep in his chest as he surges to his feet. But he needn't have worried.

Sarada's face flames red, and even without her glasses her aim is impeccible.

"BAKA."

A sickening crunch can be heard as she slams her chakra-coated fist into Boruto's face, sending him flying out over the lake and skipping over the water like a stone. Eventually he hits the ground on the other side, leaving a meteoric trail in the dirt.

Sasuke stares at his daughter incredulously before whipping his head around to question his wife.

Sakura merely shrugs, a sly smirk curling on her lips.

"That's my girl."


	9. home

**title:** home  
**disclaimer:** naruto, not mine since 1999.

* * *

There have been many nights like this under the open air, too many to count. The air is crisp and cold, the stars painfully bright in the velvety blue-black night sky.

As he rests there on the ground, arm folded behind his head, Sasuke thinks about all the things he's left behind.

A warm bed, for one. But he can easily find one of those.

A decent meal. He can't remember the last time he had a meal that wasn't tack or preserved. Hot food is a luxury that this sinner forgoes while he finds himself. He barely remembers what a tomato tastes like.

Friendship. Brotherhood. Naruto understands why he had to go. Why he'll come back. Thanks to Naruto, his feet have found the path again, and he knows his rival will never begrudge him the need to walk it.

Guidance. Kakashi understands the need more atonement more than any of them, and he is grateful to the older man for allowing him to fix his mistakes.

Home. Home is a place he has barely been in the last eight years. One month's respite cannot make up for the years lost or the wrongs done. Home is not an empty house full of ghosts or a village that doesn't trust him. But home isn't just a place…

Sakura.

He misses Sakura with an ache so profound and sharp that he's tempted to check his chest for holes.

The hope in her eyes that day as he left, _he's always leaving_, has made him think that maybe this time, _for once in his life_, he can do the right thing.

He _knows_, even as he _knows_ that he had to make this journey, that she should never have had to wait for him. That she shouldn't be waiting now. But her unbending faith in him gives him a spark of hope that maybe the man she believes in really _is_ inside him.

It's been two years, two years too long, and he wonders if he's yet learned enough of what the world has to teach him. He's seen life and death, destruction and rebirth, love and hate. Is he wise enough to be deserving of those he left behind?

He looks to the stars for answers, but they keep their ancient mysteries to themselves. But as he stares long enough, he starts to see her face in their patterns. He starts to hear her laugh in his memory and feel the imprint of her smile on his thudding heart.

The answer is there, he's just been walking around it. Home isn't just a bed, or where he eats or trains. Home is where the people who love him are. Home is the people who make him want to try to be better than he his. Home is where his heart has long since been, even if he didn't want to notice its absence.

Home is Sakura's smile and Sakura's laugh and the way she says "Sasuke-kun!" Home is how Sakura would follow him to the ends of the earth, but understands when he needs to go alone. Home is where she waits and waits, and it doesn't matter if it's Konoha or Hell, he will fight his way back to wherever she is.

It's nearly two in the morning in the middle of nowhere, and Sasuke gets to his feet brusquely, gathering his things and wrapping his poncho around him.

It's time to go home.

Home to Sakura.


	10. it is

**title:** it is  
**disclaimer:** naruto, not mine since 1999.

* * *

It should be a simple thing to rap his knuckles against this slat of wood.

It should be, because he's walked and burned in the fires of his own hell.

It should be, because almost everything that has stood in the way of his goals (with the notable exception of a bewhiskered blonde teammate) has fallen before his single-minded determination.

It should be, because there is no reason for him to be afraid of the girl behind this door that has always loved him.

It should be, because he's already apologized, which means the hardest part is over, right?

It should be, because this is _home_.

But it's not, because Sakura's love for him has always been the simplest, purest thing in his world, and Uchiha Sasuke has always been a complicated man.

It's not, because he is afraid.

It's not, because what if she's changed her mind?

It's not, because he's been gone so long, _again_, and how long can he reasonably expect her to wait?

It's not, because he's selfish.

It's not, because he cant lose her.

It's not, because her walking away might be worse than her dying.

It's not, because he completely deserves that.

But as he slams a fist against the door in frustration, and it opens to reveal a smiling medic with tears in her eyes, he discovers that it really is that simple.


	11. paperheart

**title: **paperheart  
**summary**: this weight he knows how to carry.  
**disclaimer: **naruto, not mine since 1999.  
**note: **post-699, pre-Sarada.

* * *

Sakura's father dies two days before her twentieth birthday.

His loss is sudden, unexpected. His heart failed in the middle of grocery shopping with his wife, and he died in the street before Sakura could get to him.

If there are two things Sasuke understands, they are grief and guilt. In addition, he understands Sakura. Or, at least, he is learning to.

He has been home for nearly half a year, and somehow it felt natural to move into her apartment rather than finding a place of his own. Their relationship fell into place from there.

So Sasuke understands that Sakura is a woman who gives all of the room in her heart to other people (most of it is his), and saves none for herself.

He understands that she is selfless and giving to a fault, and she is beautiful for it.

He understands that since childhood, she no longer puts her own pain first. She will never again ask of Naruto the promise of a lifetime, and will instead work to fulfill it herself.

Because of this, he understands that the smile she wears around him now is a lie. The weight of it drags his heart down to his feet, because he knows the reason for it.

He knows that the moment she turns her face away from his gaze, her smile will collapse into trembling lips. Her nails will bite into the palms of her hands, and her shoulders will shake with the effort of silent sobs.

He is _angry_ at Sakura. Angry, and it makes him love her more because he has never deserved the way she tries to take his burdens from him.

She weeps openly in front of her friends and her mother. She allows herself to cry freely on their shoulders, and the tears flow down her cheeks as she recites her father's cheesiest jokes at the funeral.

But when the sun goes down and they're lying in bed, she bites her lip to keep from making a single sound and screws her eyes shut tight so that she won't leak any tears.

At first, Sasuke doesn't understand. Around him, she is all smiles and cheer and daily routine. But it doesn't take him long to see through the facade of her fake expressions, to read the tension in every line of her body.

Once again, it's because of him.

It's not that he hasn't tried to comfort her. He holds her at night and strokes her hair, trying to tell her in his own silent way that he's here for her. But she just smiles that hollow smile and tells him she's alright.

Sakura is a terrible liar.

It's a week after the funeral when he realizes what she's doing. She's holding in her grief around him, hiding her pain.

She feels _guilty_.

She feels _guilty_ because his _whole family_ is dead, his _whole clan_ is gone, and in her head she's comparing her grief over losing her father to how he must have felt when he lost _everyone_ he loved.

When he realizes this, Sasuke sees white. He is furious that she would do something so _stupid_, so _utterly idiotic_.

"It's not a contest," he growls at her one night as they're getting ready for bed. That plastic smile is on her face again and he can't stand it for one more minute. It's worse than watching her cry.

"Eh?" Sakura looks at him blankly.

Throwing the covers off his torso, he rises from his seated position on the bed and stalks over to her with all the grace of a predatory feline. He traps her against the frame of the bathroom door, caging her in with his arms. Sakura is not alarmed, merely numbly curious. It makes him angrier.

"I said," he enunciates each word slowly, "that it's not a contest. Stop it. Stop comparing your loss to mine. It irrelevant. Stop pretending that you're not a mess."

He gently cups her chin in his fingers, forcing her dead eyes to meet his.

"It's okay," he tells her, his voice softer now. "You can cry or scream or whatever you need to do. You don't owe it to me to pretend otherwise."

He pulls her against his chest, fitting her head perfectly beneath his chin. He holds her like that for along time, both of them still, their breathing the only sound in the silent room.

Then, he hears the smallest sob. So subtle that he almost mistakes it for a hiccup, until he feels the accompanying drip of hot tears onto his bare chest. His arms tighten around her as her quiet sobs become terrible wails of grief, her whole body quaking.

Sasuke's heart clenches as the floodgates of her pain finally open. He is not a man of words, he doesn't have the words to say to ease the empty hole in her heart.

But his arms are strong, and she clings to him as he carries her to their bed.

This kind of pain is a burden that he knows how to carry. And if she won't let him carry it for her, then he'll just have to carry her.


	12. monster in the mirror

**title: **monster in the mirror  
**summary:** but most of all, he leaves for her.  
**disclaimer:** naruto, not mine since 1999.  
note: sasu-angst before he leaves on his redemption journey (or as I call it, the hippie trip). his life is the definition of ptsd.

* * *

Three a.m. is the darkest, loneliest hour of the night, and its this hour that has found a brooding Uchiha awake every night for the last two weeks. On edge, his body curls into itself, hunched over the loveseat with his head in his hands.

The second hand on the old clock on the wall provides a mantra to his breathing, the only sounds in the dark of the small apartment. Sometimes, through his ragged breaths, he can hear Sakura turning in her sleep in the next room.

His bloodred glance carries through the open door, and in a shaft of moonlight he can see her chest rising and falling in a steady rhythm. His fists clench, nails biting into his skin.

Guilt is the emotion that Sasuke hates the most. It's the one that he cannot exercise his impressive masterful control over, the one he cannot compartmentalize away to where he does not feel it.

It is also the emotion that he carries in most abundance. Guilt over his family's death, guilt over his brother's life, guilt over shoving his second family away and trying to kill them.

The guilt of trying to destroy his second chance at a brother in Naruto.

The guilt of trying to erase Sakura from his heart and life, when she was the light that tethered him in his darkness.

And they forgave him.

But he can't forgive himself.

* * *

Sometimes, during his nightly hauntings of Sakura's apartment, he'll find himself in front of the mirror in the entrance hall.

He stares into his own flat, dull black eyes for hours at a time, searching for the demon he knows is in there. The demon that has no problem murdering his best friend or slaughtering the girl that he will always want to protect, no matter how strong she gets.

She lets him stay in this apartment with her when he has no place else to go. She goes to all of his meetings with the village council and elders, and he knows she'll be at the trial. She cooks his meals and buys him new clothes, sewing his family crest onto them with care.

And what if the monster inside him emerges again? What if he hurts her and can't take it back? All that power and strength he's carefully and jealously horded are suddenly a double-edged weapon, and much sharper than he remembers.

In the course of these thoughts, his gaze is invariably drawn to the door, just a few feet away. He could leave. He could disappear into the dark and never hurt her again. He could live the rest of his life alone and leave her to live a normal life with a normal guy who isn't haunted by both the dead and the living.

But she would never do that, and he finds that he can't even take that first step toward the door.

* * *

He can't stay here.

The weeks pass by in a sleepless haze, and Sakura has noticed the dark circles beneath eyes and his listlessness. She asks him if he'd rather stay with Naruto or Kakashi and he shakes his head.

He wants to stay here, her presence is the eye of his tempest. But even the balm that she provides to his aching soul is not enough.

He's going to have to exorcise this demon in his head if he can ever hope to be what she deserves. She's already everything he needs, but he needs to put himself on equal footing before he can give as much as he has taken.

He wants to give her his heart and not an anchor to weigh her down.

So quietly he begins to gather supplies for a journey. She observes him nervously, but says nothing. He can read the fear in her eyes, that he's leaving again and she blames herself.

On the day he leaves, he sees her downcast expression and the way she lets her hair fall to cover her heart in her eyes. He knows the question she'll ask before she asks it.

He turns her down gently. These sins and these demons must never be allowed to harm her again, and seeing her feelings written all over her face gives him new resolve.

He will travel the world, gazing upon the destruction left in his own wake and he will seek to atone. If he is to carry this guilt, then it will be alongside the knowledge that he has done everything he could to temper it with deeds of repentance.

But this time, he will not leave Sakura with nothing. He taps her forehead gently, smiling into her surprised eyes. "Maybe next time," he tells her, and he vows to make it true.

"Thank you."


	13. meadows of memory

**title:** meadows of memory  
**prompt:** thanks to kakashi, sakura has unexpected company on her mission.  
**disclaimer:** naruto, not mine since 1999.

* * *

Sakura sighs and lets her heavy pack drop to the ground. Leaning against an old tree, she slides down to rest beside her bag. It's the only tree in the whole meadow, and after a whole day of gathering herb gathering, she's not about to pass up a chance at some shade.

Today wraps up her three week mission in Grass Country. Not too far from home, but far enough to give her some breathing room. The war has been over for a year, and the months have passed by in a chaotic whirl of rebuilding buildings and alliances.

Along with Shizune, Sakura has been placed in charge of overseeing the hospital. There are policies to reform, a mountain of paperwork to be done, and an endless, steady flow of patients in need of her expertise.

Kakashi, now Hokage, has been keeping an eye on her and watching with some concern as Sakura works herself to the bone. He only steps in when he finds that she's set up a cot and mini-fridge in her office.

So here she is in this small border-town in Grass Country. Its citizens are kind, but ill. Sakura soon determined the source of the problem: a dead and diseased cow rotting in the town's primary water supply. The last three weeks have been spent making herbal remedies to remove the toxins from the sick and caring for them as they wretch and shake in agony.

Today is her last day here, and it has been spent in the meadows on the outskirts of town, gathering vital plants that she's been sorely lacking back in Konoha.

Sakura reclines back against the ancient oak, watching as the sun dies in a firestorm of yellows and reds arcing in streaks across the sky. Even as she keeps her senses alert, she can feel her body becoming languid and comfortable.

Just as she's nearly dozing off, a presence pricks at the edges of her awareness. Tensing, she draws a kunai and scans the area for life. Suddenly, a large chakra flares to life in the branches above her head.

Sakura rolls to the side, rapidly rising to a battle stance. A figure drops from the tree to land gracefully in front of her. Her kunai is raised, other hand at the ready and clenched in a fist.

They are rendered unnecessary by the familiarity of the man. He looks different, his lean frame buried in a tent of a ragged poncho, and the normally wild spikes of his hair tamed by a length of cloth wound around his head.

Sakura doesn't move. She can't breathe.

He offers her a small, amused smile. "Sakura."

"Sasuke-kun." A radiant smile breaks over her face, crinkling her eyes and making her jaw ache. She doesn't care.

She takes a tentative step toward him, hands slightly raised. She wants to throw her arms around him, but is hyperaware of his discomfort with physical contact.

But he makes the first move, reaching her in two long strides. His arm reaches around and pulls him toward her, and he rests his chin atop her head. There are no words between them as he holds her, and he doesn't object as she wraps her arms around his torso. Sakura's face flames red as she rests her forehead against his shoulder.

As the sun sinks into the horizon, they find themselves seated side-by-side under the tree. They lace their fingers together as the first stars start to sparkle in the night sky. Sakura leans her head against Sasuke's shoulder, feeling truly content for the first time in a long time.

She turns her head to look at his face as a thought strikes her. "How did you know where to find me"

A smirk dances across Sasuke's lips as he presses them against her hair. "A scarecrow told me," he murmurs in her ear.

Sakura flushes. Kakashi. She should have guessed that he had a side motive for sending her out here. But all thoughts of her sensei and his antics fly out of her head as Sasuke untangles his fingers from hers to lightly brush her cheek. They gently trail down the side of her face until they rest beneath her chin, tilting her face up toward his.

His lips are soft on hers, moving slowly. Sakura can feel tears pricking at the corners of her eyes, moved by his gentleness. It's not a long kiss, they're both still new at this and unsure, but his face lingers close to hers as their lips part. He studies her features, as though trying to memorize her and discover every change.

Her lips tip into a smile and his follow. It doesn't matter that they're miles away from Konoha, wherever the other is, that is home.


	14. proud

**title:** proud  
**prompt:** sasuke hears about sasori's defeat at sakura's hands.  
**disclaimer:** naruto, not mine since 1999.

* * *

"Sasuke."

The last of the Uchiha pointedly ignores his company as he continues to sharpen his chokuto with a whetstone clutched in his hand.

Suigetsu rolls his eyes, used to this behavior. "Sasukeeeeeeeee. Oi. I've got news you might be interested in."

Sasuke does not give any indication that he has heard Suigetsu's words. Light weakly filters in through the lone cracked window, giving his pale skin a sickly pallor.

His teammate sighs in disgust. "You know what, fine. I don't want to tell you anyway, even if it is about Akatsuki."

He's said the magic word, and Sasuke finally turns to face him, his dark eyes somehow managing to looking bored and menacing at the same time. "And? What about them?" he drawls, almost disinterestedly.

Suigetsu snorts. "Heard another one went down. That puppet freak, Sasori. I guess he got his ass handed to him by some weird pink-haired chick from Konoha. Supposedly she really messed him up bad, but not before he stuck his sword in her gut."

If Suigetsu is expecting a reaction, he doesn't get one. Sasuke's face is unreadable, his eyes blank. The water-based nin shrugs and wanders out of the room to find some food.

* * *

Sasuke sits there for a long time, not moving and watching the shadows creep over the walls. Anyone observing him might think that he's asleep, but his fists are clenched and his slumped figure is tight with tension.

_Sakura._

There is only one kunoichi who could match Suigetsu's rough description, and he has no doubt that it was the girl he left on the bench three years ago.

Could she really have taken on a member of Akatsuki and _won_? He tries to think back to the last time he saw her, and he remembers the crater she left in the ground and the glow of chakra surrounding her fist. Her speed is average at best, but if she were to land a blow, it would be instantly devastating.

But is that enough to best someone like Sasori? The master of puppets…but while Sakura's new strength is formidable, Sasuke knows that her greatest asset has always been her sharp, quicksilver intelligence. Given those two things in tandem, she might well have stood a chance at out-maneuvering him.

Unbidden, a smirk curls his lips.

There she goes again, always surprising him. And though he would never admit it, he is proud.


	15. entanglement

**title:** entanglement  
**prompt: **sasuke &amp; sakura's hair  
**disclaimer: **naruto, not mine since 1999.

* * *

Sasuke likes Sakura best when she's sleeping, when the last vestiges of innocence still cling to her eyelashes and the echoes of carefree laughter long left behind in childhood still hover between her parted lips.

During the long nights when he can't sleep, he unconsciously anticipates the way her arms will seek him out, the way her hands will curl around his abdomen as if to never let him go. He needs the way her head comes to rest against his heart, and he syncs its beating with the tempo of the rising and falling of her chest.

This is how he relearns to breathe, one heartbeat at a time. The sight of her sleeping face eases the iron bands around his lungs, and he remembers how it feels to flex the corners of his mouth in something other than a scowl. He takes deep breaths, uncomfortable with the sensation after living so long as a steel coil of tension.

As the full moon waxes in the inky night sky, he hesitantly lifts his remaining hand. Lighter than the touch of a feather, he brushes at the pink tendrils of hair that have fallen to rest across her lips. He pauses as a puff of her breath blows the strands to the side, then tentatively curls the stray lock around his forefinger.

Even diluted by the moon's light, Sakura's hair still reminds him of spring, of genin days, and days where he might have been something close to happy.

He lets the strands unravel from his blood-stained finger, he is not fit to touch her. And yet, here she lies across his chest, exposed and vulnerable in her sleep. The significance of this trust sends a searing ache through his chest, and this time he allows his hand to sift through her soft tresses, coming to rest at the back of her neck.

His breath catches in his throat as she shifts in her sleep, but she soon settles back into easy slumber. His fingers return to weaving in and out of her hair, shorter now than it was when they were younger.

He doesn't recall the exact moment of its severance, only the bruises on her face that accompanied it and the black fire burning through his veins at the sight. His fist clenches in a mass of pink, and he releases it in a panic as Sakura winces in her sleep.

He does recall the way her hair used to hang down her back like a bright beacon, beckoning him onward whenever he acted as rear guard on missions.

She used to be so proud and conscientious of her mane, and Sasuke smirks to himself as he considers the difference between then and now. Now, while her hair is just as soft and luxuriant, it gets shoved harshly out of her face and thrown haphazardly into a tail behind her head.

Sasuke likes to tug on it when she comes home from the hospital, likes to see the exasperation in her eyes as he releases her signature feature from its confines, noting the way it falls to frame her face. To distract her from his fascination, he'll smirk at her and poke her forehead.

Lost in thought, fingertips gently massing her scalp of their own accord, he is startled to find apple-green eyes blinking hazily at him.

"Saskun…wha're you doin'?" she slurs sleepily.

Sasuke shakes his head, smiling to himself. She's so damn beautiful, even when she's incoherent. "Nothing, go back to sleep."

But Sakura frowns. "Tha' doesn't feel like nothin'," she mumbles, "it feels good."

On a whim, Sasuke curls a large section of carnation pink around several fingers and lifts it to his lips. Blearily, Sakura watches him in fascination.

"My hair's too short," she grumbles.

Sasuke snorts lightly, a gust of air that scatters the strands of her hair everywhere. "It is not. It suits you."

Her frown turns into a scowl as her eyelids flutter shut again. "But you like long hair."

His eyes are rolling, even if she can't see it. "Sakura, I like your hair."

To prove his point, he leans over and lightly kisses the crown of her head. She looks up at him, confused. "But when we were younger-"

"When we were younger I was a little shit, and you listened to the opinion of girls that I still have yet to give the time of day."

Sasuke lies back with a satisfied expression, watching the wheels turn behind her eyes. After a minute, he sees it start to fall into place for her.

"So," she starts slowly, "you don't mind that my hair is short?"

He shakes his head, a smile playing at his lips. "No. I like it better this way. But if you wanted to grow it out, I would like that too."

Sakura's face scrunches in confusion. "Okay. But it's still pink."

He sighs. "So?"

"So pink is so…I don't know. Girly."

He takes her chin between his fingers, forcing her gaze to his. "Sakura. It's not girly, it's you. And I. Like. It."

The disbelief finally clears from her expression, and she stretches out so she can kiss him lightly. Mischieviously, she reaches up to ruffle his unruly spikes.

"I like yours too, Sasuke-kun."


	16. the in-between

**title: **the in-between  
**summary: **life goes on, even when he's not there.  
**disclaimer:** naruto, not mine since 1999.

* * *

There is a subtle difference in the way she breathes now from two years ago, or even a few months ago. It is an unconscious acknowledgement, and the ever-present weight that she has carried since she was twelve years old has shifted from her heart to her lungs.

The despair has dissipated, only to be replaced by the anxiety of anticipation. Chasing has turned to waiting, and Sakura chafes at the knowledge that she can no longer be proactive in this.

It was Sasuke's choice to leave, as it always has been, and it was his choice to go alone in search of self-discovery. Can she blame him then, when the years spent in his absence, as well as that of her other teammates, gave her the same opportunity? Still, this transition in the dynamic between them has left her bereft, standing on a precipice of uncertainty now that she has nobody's back to chase.

So Konoha rebuilds, and so does Sakura. As the silhouettes of tall buildings once again rise against the sky, so do the foundations of Sakura's life. She moves her things into a brand new, empty apartment, and assigns herself extra shifts at the hospital. She volunteers at the Yamanaka flower shop, mending and strengthening her frayed bonds with Ino. Time is made to spend with each of her friends, not just her team. And somehow she becomes the Rokudaime's unofficial assistant, a slave to unwanted paperwork.

Because if Sasuke is to come home, not just to Konoha, but to her, then she needs to stand ready. She must be whole herself, able to stand firm to bear the combined weight of their former brokenness. Love heals, but she must not allow her own healing to be dependent on anyone but herself.

Still, it is not easy to erase years' worth of anxiety, and though Sakura does all the right things and makes all the right motions of going through daily life with her head held high, her heart feels simultaneously full and empty. A year and a half is a long time to wait, the passage of time coiling around her neck and choking her.

And on a day when she is overwhelmed by it, she leaves the hospital early. Craving solitude, her feet find a familiar path leading toward the village exit. A bench once stood here, and Sakura marks its absence in her mind. The summer grass is veridian and inviting, and so she finds herself seated, arms behind her and legs stretched before her.

Just as an irritatingly familiar sigh is about to pass between her lips, a bird lands on the ground beside her. It's a hawk, small for its kind, and it tilts its head at her in greeting. Sakura can't help but stare, her breathing ceasing. Caught in the bird's beak is a single flower.

A blue forget-me-not.

Sensing her acceptance of its presence, the tiny hawk hops into her lap. Beside herself, Sakura breaks into a tremulous smile, nearly unable to believe what's in front of her. She holds out her hand, and the hawk drops the flower into her open palm.

"Tell him to come home soon," she whispers.

The hawk nods, taking off into the air. Sakura watches as it vanishes into the overwhelming brightness of the sun before reappearing, spiraling lazily off into the distance. She glances down at the flower in her hand.

It doesn't need to be spring for the flower of hope to blossom.


	17. skin and bones

**title: **skin and bones  
**summary**: AU. this is all that's left when all the love is gone.  
**pair: **sasusaku-ish  
**disclaimer: **naruto, not mine since 1999.  
**note I**: i don't know what this is. i just wanted to write angst.  
**note II**: the title is based on the same-titled song by beth crowley. give it a listen while you're reading.

* * *

The deafening silence in the cavernous apartment is terrifyingly familiar. How long has it been since she's heard his voice, his laugh, his signature monosyllabic reply?

Twenty-two days, 13 hours, and forty-seven minutes.

She's used to him traveling on business, that's the nature of the beast and she's known it since they hooked up in the back bedroom of his best friend's house four years ago. They've since fallen head-first into a relationship and graduated from university, moved in and started the beginnings of a life together.

She's a doctor beginning her residency and he's a prodigal son being groomed to take over the family corporation. Long nights in the hospital and long days on the road leave them precious little time to see each other, but it was working okay until now, when suddenly it isn't.

Her hours have become longer and his business trips have steadily become lengthier, until he's gone for weeks at a time and she's left alone in this cold, dark apartment that now feels more like a cave than a home.

* * *

The steady thrum of her heartbeat is uncomfortably loud in this large, empty room. Even the usual hum of the lights is silent as she sits in the dark. What's the point of even turning them on? Nobody's coming home.

The living room wall against her back is her only company as Sakura pulls her bare legs in against her chest, wrapping her arms around herself tightly. She bites her lip, harshly forbidding herself from crying.

She's made her decision, and she's not going to let it reduce her to a helpless puddle of wasted tears. This is easier said than done as hot tears prick at the corners of her eyes. She bites down harder and screws her eyes shut.

The vast distance between them is supposed to have made this easier. Sasuke hasn't called, hasn't texted, hasn't e-mailed, hasn't anything since he left three weeks ago. That's not acceptable, it's _not_, and it's the last straw for Sakura, who has seen the apathy growing in his eyes for months.

So then why is her breathing pierced with sharp pains and every tiniest thought of him riddled with agony?

* * *

It's some hours later, after Sakura has fallen asleep in her cramped position against the wall, that the door to the apartment creaks open. The sounds of a deep voice cursing rouse Sakura from her slumber, and she blinks blearily at her boyfriend of nearly five years, who has just stumbled over the boxes of his things piled by the door.

"Sakura, what the hell is all this?"

His normally pristine suit is rumpled and disheveled from travel, and Sakura takes in the sight of him numbly as he massages his sore foot. She doesn't know how she finds the courage to say the next words that she's suddenly speaking.

"Your things," she intones calmly, "so you can be out tonight."

He stares at her in disbelief. "What are you talking about?"

Sakura turns away, her resolve already shaking. "Just leave."

Sasuke, already not a verbose man, is at a loss for words. "Why?" His hands hang loosely at his sides, jacket fallen to the floor. He looks genuinely confused, and Sakura stares at him dully. There's no excuse for his surprise.

The smile that breaks upon her lips borders on hysterical, and she fights back the painful laughter that bubbles up in her chest.

"Don't be obtuse, Sasuke, it's terribly unbecoming." Her voice is nearly a whisper, her large veridian eyes wide and shining with angry tears. She won't let them fall, not in his presence.

As if in confirmation of every bolt of agony electrifying her nerve endings, the stoic expression on his face bears no trace of someone who's heart is shattering.

"You can't stand there and tell me," she starts with anger rising, "that you haven't been passive-aggressively trying to get out of this relationship, Sasuke."

He opens his mouth, perhaps to defend himself, but Sakura cuts him off.

"There is _nothing_, not _one thing _that you can say that will justify you not calling or answering my calls or texts for _almost a month_. So just go on and leave, because you obviously don't want to be here anymore."

The lease is in her name, so she feels no guilt as she opens the door and begins pushing them out into the hall. Sasuke merely stands there, running a hand through his perfect jet hair that she has spent hours of her life tugging on in heated moments.

"What do you want from me, Sakura?" He's not even angry, he just sounds tired.

Sakura whirls around, suddenly furious. "What do I want? Nothing! Not anymore, because that's all you've got left to give me is _nothing_." She spits out the word as though it's imbued with a foul taste. "Just go! _Leave_! I don't want you here anymore!"

All that precious self-control is wasted now as she starts to cry in earnest. She doesn't bother to wipe the tears away as she roughly shoves Sasuke's belongings out of her apartment and out of her life.

"Sakura-"

"Shut up, just SHUT UP." The last comes out as a scream, and in the small part of her mind that's not numb or bruised, she berates herself for being one of those girls.

She never wanted to be one of those people whose relationship crumbles into dust at their feet after it's long past its expiration date. And now she's here making a scene when all she wanted was to keep her cool and walk away with at least some part of her dignity intact.

But now she won't even have that.

His face twists into something almost resembling concern, but he doesn't make a move to comfort her. In a way she's glad he doesn't, because then she would have hated him.

Instead he stares at her for a long time, searching her eyes for something, she doesn't know what. She wonders if he has regrets, if there's another woman, if anybody could ever make him happy. She wonders if she ever did.

"I don't want to leave," he says softly.

Sakura closes her eyes against the tide of emotion that threatens to overwhelm her again. "Well, you've done a piss-poor job of showing it."

"I know." She hears him sigh and the rustle of clothing as she stuffs his hands into his pockets.

"That's not enough." Her throat constricts around the words. "Do you even love me?"

She opens her eyes, seeing the tired rings around his for the first time. His eyes are not quite begging her, but there is an earnestness there that she's never seen before, and she feels the ground that she had been so sure was firm beneath her start to crumble.

He takes a breath and moves toward her.

"I want to come home to you. Not anybody else. Not to an empty apartment." His lips pinch together, as if he knows that that's not nearly enough of what she wants to hear. But Sasuke is nothing if not honest, when he chooses to speak.

"I want this. I want us. I want to wake up to you, even if that means it's because you've only stumbled in from the hospital as I'm getting up for the day. I want to come home to you even if means you're just leaving for the night. I want you as my anchor when I'm gone, as the one thing that I want to come home to. A reason to _want_ to come home."

Sakura doesn't quite remember him moving, or her arms wrapping around him to fist in the back of his shirt. Her clenched hands pull the fabric tightly, her forehead resting against his chest. Hot tears drip to the floor between them. "You didn't answer my question. And you didn't call."

"I know," he says, his body shaking almost imperceptibly.

The large fissures in Sakura's heart crack and expand again, shifting constantly as they have been since he came through the door. He doesn't want to go and she doesn't know if she can stand to let him stay.

Her voice shakes with the weight of her words. "I think you should go."

She can feel his body tense beneath her arms, and he pulls away with a blank face. Sakura looks down at the floor, anywhere but at those eyes that cause her heart to beat painfully even as it's broken. He turns to retrieve his jacket and his briefcase, but he halts as she continues speaking.

"For now. Go stay with Naruto, stay with Kakashi, I don't care. Figure out what you want, what I want, what _we_ want. And then come back."

Sakura's fists clench at her sides. She hopes she's doing the right thing. Sasuke nods at her, his back straightening. Before he disappears through the door, he kisses her forehead gently.

Her eyes flutter shut at the touch of his lips, and as the door clicks shut, she resumes her place against the brace of the cold wall.


	18. whispers of the past

**title: **whispers of the past  
**summary**: post-699, post-the last. in the midst of moving in with sakura, sasuke finds some old things of hers.  
**disclaimer:** naruto, not mine since 1999.

* * *

Sakura has a lot of stuff.

This is the thought that prefaces Sasuke's day as he begins the process of merging his life with hers.

He is home for good now, his long journey of discovery and redemption complete. Of course, those things are a life-long endeavor, but he feels that maybe he has earned the right to continue that effort surrounded by the people who have always made him better, from the comfort of a home that he hasn't had in years.

Thankfully, he only has a few meager boxes of possessions to find a space for. He has no additional clothing beyond what's on his back (Sakura will very soon remedy this), and only has a few select weapons and priceless mementos from his family's old home: some photographs, his mother's favorite knick-knacks, his father's ceremonial sword, his brother's books on history and philosophy.

Sasuke is on his own today; Sakura has an early shift at the hospital but hopes to be let out early. He has already moved all of the boxes into her small apartment, now the challenge lies in finding space for his things.

Like his mother, Sakura has a taste for useless small decorations, scattered across every surface in the apartment. Sasuke has to admit that it does give the place a very lived-in feeling, and is somehow comforting to his former wanderer spirit.

Lifting two boxes, he carries them into the bedroom. His brother's books he can put on her shelves, he plans on reading them soon. His parents things will go into storage for now. Opening the closet, Sasuke is forced to take a step back as a barrage of clothes peeks out at him. He's never seen her wear even half of these things, but then he has been gone for a long time.

Kneeling, he eyes a potential space on the floor beneath her hanging clothes. There are other storage containers down here, but they can be rearranged to make room. As he begins rummaging around, pushing boxes to the side, a small container falls to the floor, its contents spilling in front of him.

Sasuke peers curiously at the thin objects. They appear to be folded paper, yellowed with age. He picks one up, delicately unfolding it so as not to tear the old paper. Scanning the lines written on the page, he feels everything inside of him go cold, as if he were plunged into an icy lake.

_Dear Sasuke-kun,_

_I wish you were here. I wish you were home and that we were a team again. I know that you have things that you feel like you need to do, but I just don't understand why you won't let us help you._

_I know that my words had no effect on you that night when you left, but my feelings haven't changed. I still love you, and I hope that wherever you are, you are safe._

_Please come home soon._

_Love,_

_Sakura_

Sasuke stares at the page for a long time. His mind is blank, but his heart thuds painfully in his chest. He looks down at the other papers scattered across the floor. She wrote him _letters. _Carefully, he folds the one is holding and picks up another.

_Dear Sasuke-kun,_

_It's been three years since you've left. Naruto's gone too now, and I haven't seen Kakashi-sensei in a long time. I'm lonely and I miss you, but I've been training hard, and under the new Hokage. She's a sannin, just like Orochimaru._

_I'm going to bring you home, Sasuke-kun. Back to Konoha, team seven, and me. I know it's selfish to add myself to that list, but I can't help it. The world has been so empty with you gone._

_I'll see you soon._

_Love,_

_Sakura_

There is a space in his chest that feels as though it's been hollowed out, and he is seeing for the first time the effects of his decision to leave.

He doesn't know how long he sits there, reading and reading her words, imprinting them in his memory. He reads every letter, his heart shrivelling in shame. Finally, he finds the last one still wedged inside the box.

Her handwriting in this letter is very shaky and the paper is stained by tears.

_Dear Sasuke-kun,_

_This is the last letter I will ever write to you. I am about to attempt the hardest thing I will ever do in my life, and that means saying goodbye to you._

_I dont know how to reach you anymore, Sasuke-kun. You've gone down a path so dark and dangerous that I don't know if it's even possible to save you._

_We've been sent on a mission to destroy you, Sasuke-kun, but I'm going to do it myself. Tomorrow I'll make sure my teammates are out of harm's way, and then I will somehow find the courage to do what must be done._

_I love you so much that I can't stand to watch you do this to yourself, and that's why I have to do this. If you can't forgive me, I hope you can at least understand._

_I love you, Sasuke-kun._

_Love Always,_

_Sakura_

Sasuke has to stop reading this letter and restart several times. His shoulders shake in dry, silent sobs, and each drawn breath is ragged and painful. The paper crinkles in his tightly clenched fist.

"Sasuke-kun?"

Behind him, the bedroom door opens and Sakura enters. She comes to kneel beside him, curiously glancing at what he's doing.

"Eh? What's this?"

She picks up a letter, and a moment later her eyes flash in recognition. Her gaze swivels to his face in alarm. But Sasuke isn't looking at her, his eyes are screwed shut and his mouth is a twisted line of grief.

"I'm sorry," he mutters through clenched teeth.

Sakura's gaze softens into sorrow and concern.

"I'm sorry," he says again, louder this time. This time, he looks her in the eyes, his expression one of tortured agony. Sakura pulls him into her embrace, and even as his face is buried in her neck, he continues to mutter his apology as a litany, over and over until her heart breaks.

"It's okay, Sasuke-kun," she whispers, holding him tight.

"No, it's not," he growls against her throat. He lifts his head to meet her eyes, and his are angry. Not at her, but at himself.

She smiles sadly. "Sasuke-kun, you've already been forgiven. You're here now, and that's what matters."

Sasuke just shakes his head, retreating inside himself to brood. Sakura sighs. "I'll go call Naruto and Kakashi and tell them to cancel dinner."

She moves to get up, but Sasuke's arm holds tight around her. "Stay," he whispers hoarsely. She nods, settling against him.

And so they lay amongst scattered memories, making new ones as he relearns what it is to love.


	19. baby, it's cold outside

**title: **baby, it's cold outside  
**summary: **AU. the snow isn't the only thing that's cold as sakura returns home for winter break.  
**disclaimer: **naruto, not mine since 1999.  
**characters: **fugaku and sakura  
**dedication: **because it finally is, in fact, cold outside here.

* * *

"UGH, COULD THIS DAY POSSIBLY GET ANY WORSE?"

In a fit of frustration, Sakura punches her steering wheel, earning her a loud, blaring honk. She sighs in despair and rests her forehead against the same steering wheel she just assaulted.

Half a day into winter break and already it's a disaster.

She is a full time pre-med student at Suna University, and her final exams ended earlier that afternoon, nearly making her miss her flight back to Konoha. Then, they decided to delay the flight due to bad weather conditions in Konoha, but only after the plane had already rolled out into the tarmac.

After a two hour delay and a three hour flight, she finally made it back to Fire Country. She thought she was lucky in scoring the last car from the rental place, but she may as well be better of walking home than driving this highly questionable old, beat up clunker.

Unfortunately, her misgivings turned out to be accurate as the breaks went out just as she hit a patch of ice on the road, and now here she sits half buried in a snow bank at eleven o'clock at night with no other cars in sight. She's called a towing company, but they won't come out for the car until the roads are clear, and so Sakura is left to figure out how to manage the remaining hundred miles home without a car.

* * *

Sakura's fingers are numb as she opens her dying phone again and dials a number that's as familiar to her as her birth date. Outside the car, snow is falling in droves and the temperture, already freezing, is steadily dropping further.

She prays to herself under her breath as the phone rings continuously, agitation and anxiety growing with every ring. Her friends are all back in Suna where it's nice and warm, and her parents are off on a holiday cruise. So her boyfriend had better answer his damn phone, because he's the only person within six hundred miles who can come rescue her.

Just as she's about to click the phone off and dial again (7% battery left!), the call is picked up and a sleepy voice answers, "'lo?"

Sakura breathes a heavy sigh of relief. "Sasuke-kun, you have to come get me, I'm-"

A groan comes through the other end of the line. "Ugh, Sak'ra, I'm not going anywhere. I have the flu, I can't even move my body."

"Are you kidding me?!" She screeches into the phone. "I crashed into a snowbank off the highway with no hope of rescue for probably three days! You have to come get me!"

Panic starts to rise in her chest, threatening to overwhelm her. Her hand grips the phone tightly, nearly bending it. "The engine's dead, I have no heat, I'll freeze!"

Hot tears spill down her face as she starts to hyperventilate. Sasuke sighs in her ear, and she can picture him pinching the bridge of his nose. "Sakura, it'll be okay. Look, my dad's flying home from a business conference in Ame tonight, his plane's probably already landed. He can pick you up on his way home, he'll be going the same route anyway."

This calms Sakura somewhat, but also brings on a whole new set of anxieties. Sasuke's dad is scary. Not scary as in horror movie scary, but he's super intimidating. She and Sasuke have been dating since high school, so she's met the man a few times, but she's never been in his presence for more than a few minutes at a time. As a high profile businessman, he's often busy and away from home.

Interrupting her thoughts, Sasuke continues, "Let me call him and tell him wha's going on and then I'll call you back.'Kay?"

He DOES sound pretty congested and she probably doesn't want him driving on whatever he's knocked back to help himself sleep, so she agrees. The line goes dead and she's left with nothing but the falling snow for company.

* * *

A text from Sasuke has confirmed the imminent arrival of his father and his agreement to give her a ride, and an hour passes as she anxiously waits.

Eventually, a black 4x4 SUV pulls up on the side of the road near her totalled vehicle. The brand new, top-of-the-line expensive model suggests that it couldn't be anyone _other_ than Uchiha Fugaku. A tall figure emerges from the driver's side, and Sakura would recognize that scowl anywhere; his son wears the same one all the time.

Nearly crying again with relief, she tugs on the door handle and throws her while body weight against the door. No dice. Her car has driven into the snow so far that the weight of it is pressed against the doors, trapping her inside.

Seeing her predicament, Fugaku pulls a shovel from the back of his SUV (his father is prepared for every situation, Sasuke once told her wryly), and within minutes she is free. Her suitcase is liberated from the back seat, and within minutes she's enjoying the comforts of heated leather seats.

"Thank you," she squeaks as her boyfriend's father slides into the driver'a seat and shifts the car into drive. He nods gruffly, and a tense, awkward silence follows. Sakura has never been alone with him without Sasuke present beside her, but she knows that all the Uchiha men are mostly silent and stoic. This suits her fine right right now, since she has no idea what to say.

But after a few minutes, Fugaku clears his throat awkwardly and speaks. "So you and my son…"

Oh god. This is it. Every girlfriend's worst nightmare: being asked about her sex life with their son. It might even include a lecture on protection or how she should keep her hands off of him because their baby boy is being saved for marriage.

And Sakura, with her big mouth, dreads accidentally telling him about their healthy sexting life, or their exhibitions on video chat, or the summer after high school graduation and every subsequent fall, winter, spring, and summer break since. She and Sasuke may attend separate universities, but they go at it like rabbits whenever they can, by whatever means possible.

Sakura swallows hard and snaps her attention to Fugaku's words.

"Am I correct in assuming that your relationship is serious? You have been seeing each other for quite some time."

Nervously, Sakura nods in affirmation. "Yes. We've been dating for four years." Since junior year of high school.

Fugaku is silent for a few moments as he concentrates on driving. Finally, "What are your intentions with my son?"

Sakura's mind blanks.

"You have a long distance relationship at present, and that can put a strain on both people. And you are pre-med, yes? You're looking at several years of medical school after graduation and Sasuke has law school to think about. That is an incredibly difficult situation for a couple, and inevitably either your grades or your relationship will suffer."

Her throat constricts painfully. These are all things she is aware of, but to hear them put so bluntly by him puts her heart in the grip of an iron vice. He's probably going to demand that she break up with Sasuke for his own good, so that he can focus on his studies. Shitshitshit, she is _not_ going to cry in front of Fugaku.

"Sir," she swallows hard, "I love Sasuke very much. And while maybe we started out as a fling in high school, our relationship is so much more than that now. We support each other and help each other get through the hard days, even from far away. There is nothing that cheers me up over a difficult bio exam than a text from him, and I always wish him luck before debates. And if he wanted to break up because he felt his school performance was suffering, I would absolutely respect that and walk away. And I know he'd do the same. But until he makes that decision on his own, I am going to do whatever I can from wherever I am to love and support him, even if it's hard."

Sakura sinks back into her seat after this declaration and quietly catches her breath. Her face is flushed bright cherry red from embarrasment and the force of her emotion. Tentatively, she sneaks a peak at the Uchiha patriarch's face, looking for some kind of reaction.

To her surprise, he's glancing at her out of the corner of his eye, and is that a smirk he's wearing? It's the closest she's ever seen him come to smiling in all the years that she's known him.

A low chuckle escapes him. "I think I see why my son loves you. My wife too."

Seeing her stunned face, he laughs again. "You have nothing to worry about, Sakura. I just wanted to see how serious you were about my son. In any case, he's too much in love with you to tolerate any interference from me."

A warm glow fills her from head to her toes for the remainder of the ride home, and hee offers her their guest room on the condition that she make her mother's special recipe tomato soup for the ailing Sasuke. His eyes crinkle as he asks, and Sakura laughingly agrees.

Suddenly the world doesn't feel quite so cold.


End file.
